Conversations with the son they stole:
A window on the world of a father being torn from his little boy
by the secret family courts
Sunday, 17 June 2012
What's on the cards?
According to a YouGov poll in the last week, 80 per cent of Brits (and 88 per cent of fathers) think that 'Fathers day is just another way for companies to make money on cards and presents'.
This is slightly curious, given that 52 per cent of those questioned also disagreed with the notion that 'Fathers day is unimportant and just another day', but reflects the fact, I think, that whilst the day may be important, it is not treated as such, because fathers aren't regarded as important.
In the 18-24 year old age group, only 73% agreed in any way that 'Fathers are instrumental in bringing up children'. Well, what you've never known, you don't miss, I suppose. Given that only two-thirds of children have their father around, why would many more than that think they were important?
Step-Mum accidentally took me into a card shop last week and I had to leave, because all the saccharine rubbish was too upsetting. They don't do a card which says 'Thinking of you today because someone stole your child'.
Nevertheless, with the help of Moonpig, I have sent a few cards this year, to the fathers in your maternal family, all of whom have seen you more recently than me.
Most of them are professing Christians - one of them even works for the church, with young people.
All of them have stayed silent for the last two years or so. None of them have ever sought to disassociate themselves with what is being done to you, as it was done to your late Grandmother.
I could talk about 'Good men doing nothing' - but instead, noting that two of them have children younger than you, I will remind them that what they deem appropriate for you, could happen to them one day. To celebrate today for themselves, whilst agreeing that others don't deserve the same, makes their position the ultimate in hypocrisy.
And as they enjoy 'their' day, with their children and family around them, they have no more rights to fatherhood than I do. They are just running their luck for a little longer.
Ironically, it's me that's fighting to change that - for all of us. Including you.
Love from Daddy
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